20241105 - 12:00
I’ve arrived, been shown around, and now have some free time before dinner. This feels like a home. Almost frighteningly so. People look you in the eye. They talk, are interested, and warm. We shall see how the schedule goes, but first impressions exceed expectations. Only… why am I here? To practice Dhamma. Establishment in sila and sense-restraint. Socializing does not break precepts, and could very probably be conducive to sila. And yet it might be taken as a crutch. But when I look at myself honestly, is not aversion, a closed heart, coming from heartbreak? Is dispassion aversion towards life? Is it rejection or is it love? Embrace? I do not know. I can only say: I do not know. Perhaps, the middle way..