AbsurdAesthetic

"God is dead", Nietzsche declares, and the modern man is left to pick up the pieces, permanently stranded in a life he has no part in. We find the same sentiment, the absurd void which is left to be dealt with by modernity, in Dostoyevsky's novel The Brothers Karamazov, "If there is no God - then everything is permitted." Or going back even further, to Hegel, as he writes "The pure concept, however, or infinity, as the abyss of nothingness in which all being sinks, must characterize the infinite pain, which previously was only in culture historically and as the feeling on which rests modern religion, the feeling that God Himself is dead". Reading the full passage by Nietzsche gives us a feeling of the enormous consequences this leaves us with.  

"God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?" 

This is the birthright, the heritage, of modern man. In order to replace God, he has to become God. No longer in a world with external superiority, he decides his own faith. This is the birth of existentialism, of the absurdity in which he finds himself, finding a purpose in a game which he has to create himself. Everything rests on this one point. He woke up and realized that life was futile, meaningless and utterly hopeless. Now he has to get out of bed while being fully aware that he could die at any moment, rot and be completely forgotten in a few years. It is no wonder that he hides. Life is absurd, devoid of all meaning as we used to know it, and yet we must move on. 

It leaves us vulnerable, so vulnerable that most of us spend the majority of our lives running from this simple fact, trying to fit into a mold that was never meant for us. We hide ourselves in careers and families and day-time television and red wine and a stale air of importance. When we're not busy hiding from our dissatisfaction we try to justify it with extravagant plans and empty promises of change. Yet the fact remains that something is missing and unless dealt with life becomes an empty shell of what it used to be, of what it could have been. 

Reading Oscar Wilde's character Lord Henry in The Picture of Dorian Gray reminds me of aestheticism and the solution which it offers. He realizes the absurdity, the utter meaningless, and yet he not only continues on, he embraces it. He sees life for the drama that it is and celebrates the individuality found in each and every one of us, not compared to any specific moral standpoint but for the simple fact that it is fully itself. This is the solution which aestheticism offers, the ability to find beauty in things simply for their purity of existence.  

"

- There is no such thing as a good influence, Mr. Gray. All influence is immoral-immoral from the scientific point of view.

- Why?

- Because to influence a person is to give him one's own soul. He does not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions. His virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins, are borrowed. He becomes an echo of some one else's music, an actor of a part that has not been written for him. The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly-that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to one's self.”

One day, if we're lucky, something happens, and we remember. The innocent laughs of childhood, the deep whimpers and tears of heartbreak, the gleeful chirping of birds, or that warm feeling of love you got while hugging your mom goodnight. An emotion manages to penetrate that huge armor we've built around ourselves and it pierces us deeply. Through the hole in the armor we manage to get a glimpse of sunshine, and beauty returns to the world. Meaning is found everywhere, in something as simple as doing the dishes. Age-old wisdom becomes actual, and action becomes nothing more than an occasion for life to be experienced. We find the appreciation of existence, and so we are blessed with the opportunity to learn how to live again.